So this girl’s friend got wasted at a bar and ended up giving head to some random guy in the bar’s bathroom. Next morning, she wakes up in the guy’s apartment, obviously after having slept with him, not able to remember how the fuck she got there. About 3 days later, she finds this terrible rash around her vagina and mouth. And then she started foaming at the mouth. Of course she goes to the doctor, and the doctor tells her that in his many years of experience that he had never seen anything like what she had before, but that he would send in the bacteria to the lab to get it tested.
WELL. The next day, she gets a call from the doctor and he says, “I don’t know how to tell you this…but the bacteria we found only comes from dead people.” THIS DUDE IS A MORTICIAN. He has worked throughout the country at morgues. So, clearly this guy was a serious necrophiliac. Now he’s on the run, never allowed to work in a morgue again. The girl had to move and start her life over again because she lived in a small town where word gets around fast.
MORAL OF THE STORY: Don’t fuck around with guys who work at morgues.
